Kidneys and Goofy Grins

 “Kidneeeys!” she said, pointing to the place on her head where the brains should be. That was my sister in her obnoxious period, which lasted a really long time. The Kidneys-for-brains response happened whenever someone made a stupid decision; like jumping off the roof with an umbrella, thinking that would help slow the descent, or leaving your shoes in the common-space, (my father’s pet peeve; he would hide them – separately). My sister would pipe up and reinforce just how stupid your decision was.

Thanks to Beachbum07720 in insta

I found myself hearing her voice in my head as I was watching the first rays of dawn come up on my left. I was driving an hour South to go surfing at dawn in January. The commitment to surfing in the cold winter air and ocean may rank right up there with egging the cop cars, (I only did that once), but there I was. 

 

Anticipating cold water surfing is always a battle of wills. Part of my brain is saying, “What if my wetsuit has a leak I don’t know about? What if I wipe out and get flushed? I could get hypothermia.” Yada, yada, yada. The other part of my noggin reminds me that I’d taken all the precautions for safe winter surfing, including going out with a coach. The battle rages on until I get in the water.

 

My coach is Robbie Nelson. https://www.prosurfcoaches.com Back in the day, he was a professional big wave surfer and he knows everything imaginable about surfing. He knows the best spots given the wind and wave direction, the best way to put your neoprene mit on the second hand, and many fine points on surfing technique. I highly recommend him to anyone who wants to surf better.  

Many of his comments are memorable – even when chasing a wave. “Paddle tip to hip.” Or when waxing the board, “Tip to tail, rail to rail.” He says some things that aren’t helpful but memorable, “Dennis is an albino spider monkey.” (Admit it. You’ll remember that.) 

 

There are some statements that are not memorable and bear repeating, “an average 1 ft wave has 1300 PSI of power and that increases exponentially as the waves increase in size.“  Read: “respect the wave and keep yourself safe.” His comments on pop-ups and position on the wave can’t be categorized, but they are often colorful, too. 

 

He announces a session a day ahead of time and whoever answers first gets to go. (Yes, that many crazy people exist.) There are usually three other people per session. Robbie is able to keep track of everyone while assessing each person’s progress. He is also able to find the surfing spots where the waves will be good for at least two hours to assure we’ve all caught enough waves. 

Sometimes, we are the only ones out. It’s like our own world and there is nowhere else I’d rather be.

 

In this world, each of us wants to master something, whether it’s catching the wave at the right angle, or just popping up. We pull for each other. “C’mon, c’mon, c’mon,” and when the person succeeds, there is a sense of elation. The triumphant surfer come paddling back with a big, goofy grin to cheers from the rest of us. 

We all had goofy grins that day! We went home exhausted and happy. Everyone except for Robbie - he had another session. Yep, “Kidneys!”